my bf of 2 years is bipolar...

[aprilthomason85]

my boyfriend of 2 years is bipolar. at times he will say things like he doesn't want to be with me and never has. we live together and have for almost all of the 2 years we have been together.also sometimes when i call him my boyfriend to people we don't know he gets upset and says hes not. i don't get it. it really hurts me when he acts like this. is this normal for people that are bipolar or does he really not want me? i don't get it.

[Ramji]

It's hard too say.  During one of my episodes I nearly moved out and my wife talked me into counseling which, a therapist and several dr.s later, led to my diagnosis.
We (people with bipolar disorder) often make decisions during an episode we might regret later.  Also, even when things are going well in our relationship I can feel very alone.

[Joe Buck]

Other than the extreme, of the bipolar poles (depression & mania), it is near, to impossible to identify the root of said behavior. A few tips to help you & your boyfriend. BPD is a treatable illness...not a behavioral flaw, or a personal weakness. BPD does not just effect your boyfriend...but everyone in his support circle...which includes you. Reasearch has shown the more knowledge of BPD people have...the better they effectively deal with it. Join a bipolar support group. Build a support circle for your boyfriend  & yourself. Good information sites on the internet. For starters, this is one of the best..

                      http://www.dbsalliance.org/site/PageServer?pagename=home

aprilthomason85, all this is quite overwhelming...there are good people here, that will help you. Stay engaged don't be a stranger...& BPD should not define you or your boyfriend's lives.  Joe Buck (Bob)


 

[cadno]

It could be BPD, but I won't say it is for certain as so many factors could be involved.  What I can tell you is as a BP myself I have actually split with my wife during our rocky relationship three times because of the following reasons. 

• I felt I no longer loved her
• I thought she would be better off without me
• In a fit of anger I stormed out

As you can see the reasons vary but underlying those things was my condition.  I would like to second what people have said here, in particular Joe Buck when he says about information and support.  I now have a support structure in place for me and my wife, if we didn't have it I'd still be heading for the door everytime a mood took me.  Now I still head for the door, but there is often some common sense waiting for me.

Cadno

[nordicnicki]

i have been guilty in the past of denying a relationship with people......have also ended them because at that present point in time i no longer loved them or was too angry......i never seem to be able to saty with anyone for too long and then regret my actions afterwards

[Paz]

 I wish I had a good answer for you...all I can tell you is that when a BP is mood swinging, you have to try to not let the hurtful things they say get to you...we honestly don't know the damage we are causing until it's too late. I applaud you for staying with him...we are not easy people to live with. Has he ever had a period of stability? Maybe his meds need an adjustment.