Damn spaced, I can endlessley bitch about this!

[Dreamline]

I'm just dazed and confused all the time can't remember shit, my mind wants to go blank.  Makes me tired trying to read, reading is so damn hard...pisses me off because I used to be able to read a 300-400pg book in a few days, sometimes less.  But not now, I have been reading the same 300pg off and on for months and can't remember all of what I have read.  Worst of all non bp people have no clue what I go through.  I can't concentrate of stuff because my mind turns off, I don't have ADD but it seems like it now.  It really sucks because I have to be on a kind of high level for the shit to work.  There's not many others to try, most are anti psychotics no thanx, and there's no way of knowing what will work.  Its not worth it, to switch.

[Ramji]

I have memory issues too. A few months ago my doc diagnosed me as having ADD.  He prescribed Adderall ... on top of my other meds ... and it has gotten better. I stopped having suicidal thoughts too.  I still have some memory issues, but not nearly as bad as before. I have difficulty reading and have listening to audio books.

Ramji

[Paz]

 I remember when I was on Lith.....my memory went to shit. I had a hard time reading & remembering as well, the dose I was on had me in a fog all the time. I can sympathize with you, I've been there. Are you able to meditate at all? If you can, try to think of only one thing to concentrate on, and say it over & over in your head. Make a very conscious effort to remember what you are thinking about. And just try to be very aware of what you are doing or saying or even reading, in other words "mindfulness". Vigilance is key. It sucks that we need to be hyper-aware [especially when you are feeling doped] but if you are, then you will be able to focus on your book or your job or whatever you wish.
 It is a very difficult thing to do, but once you can, then you will be able to feel less spaced out and more in control.
 Hope that what I wrote makes sense, and that it helps.

[Dreamline]

I have a hard time meditating, I suck at it...either I am physically uncomfortable after a while making it impossible to focus or I get zoned out and can't stop thinking...when I am able to turn off my mind, I then become hyper-aware of my environment.  I do have theses Imramma CDs that change your brain waves.  There's different tracks for different things, ex: one's for focusing (helps with ADD, I tried it and it made me really wired, probably would make me manic if I kept listening to it), others are for deep relaxation/meditation but they make me tired (great for sleep though), there's one for getting in the "zone", that really relaxes and helps me focus.  Its a calm focused state...I haven't tired that one for meditation yet.  I use it at the gym, now I don't even need it, my brain just goes into that zone when I get there.

[Paz]

 you know, you can meditate while you walk.....just say whatever personal mantra you have in your head over & over while you are walking.....you could even do it in time to your footsteps, just to sort of calm & settle your mind.